Be with me

Be with me, 

Like an ivory moonlight over a faraway solitary lake,

Be with me, 

Like a gentle fingers of a piano player 

following the song of his heart.

Be with me,

Like a sun touching the edge of hunger of flowers petals. 

Be with me, like yourself, the gentle, warm, loving friend who I can lean on his shoulder without words. 

There is no dream of union, of forever promise.

It is a simple opening in the heart of now,

When we both arrive naked and 

Baked through the oven of life!

Be with You, is the only way I learnt to be with me.

My ultimate lover, I see and feel you, in every storm, every pleasure, in my every glance into the mirror.

Could love be more silent, deep and transparent?

I am such a lover, the one who stayed alone in dark, in fear and bondage until the rising time.

She is a Goddess, a tender one, a warrior one, a seductive and sexy one, she finally became your dream of her,

And you, my forever beloved, her heart is ready, her body aches and her womb calling your flesh inside years of waiting….longing….turning to nothing but a portal,

To receive herself in you,

To receive you in her,

Love is her moan, her joy, her aloneness,

Her hope, her mission, her home.

Love is the movement of your desire in her veins.

Be with me, whoever I am, whoever I will be, 

It is always us, you and I. Dissolving in love of one. 

Loving you is my timeless  presence on earth and beyond.

Today, I woke up knowing our flesh will meet soon, the carving inside my heart is over. 

I am ready to receive myself

In all forms, my twin, my love, my home,

My highest vibration come and be with me, 

Now and forever.

We are moon and sun,

Sky and doves,

Man and woman,

Silent and words,

We are life.
Serena Devi

Today


I sink in the river of love,

transformed in fluid joy.

Rain is gratitude of my heart

in repeated cycles of silence,

touching the sky.
The story of You and I,

Our every touch, night and day, 

Sings secretly 

the humming bird of eternal desire

to give and offer my womb, my heart

Aroused in ecstasy of coming home.

Ah, touch all empty places in me,

Let them bloom in passion of our love.

My beloved, songs go mute, my heart undressed and stars shinning more than ever,

This is our story, You and I,

There is no ending, don’t remember the start,

Keep moving your lips on my skin, I want you more than ever,

This seduction has a magic,

Pulsing in my body, raising my soul.

I love you in so many different ways,

Today, I love the touch of your fingertips,

Making ripples on river of wanting

Inside my womb.

Today, I make love with sun, sands and flying birds.

Today, I smile.

Today, my breath touches yours.
© Serena Devi

Day 1 -Landscape of feelings

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This morning I woke up from a dream, asking myself many questions about the nature of human’s heart.
There were times, I was afraid to feel, afraid of pain and joy .I was afraid to let go of suppressed emotions and accept my own power and will to choose different.
These days, life is a lucid dream which makes everything possible and changeable, I travel to memory lane with openness and excitement, I listen and let waves of feelings touch every corner of my being. I wait long enough to feelings lose their personal story and pain which always associates  with unwanted thoughts vanishes into sense of life. I stand with all of me, in the present moment and knowingly travel to all unwanted and hurtful moments. What was once named PAST, is nothing but a passing fog appearing on ground of present and the more focus I stare into it, the less I desire to carry the heaviness of my thoughts about it. I let them drop, it is so heavy and painful, this nagging judgment over events, people and outcomes. Especially when its darkness effects my present moment.
So, why I travel over and over to certain memories?!
This morning, I sat in my favorite armchair, sipping on my coffee, listening to a Serenity CD which I bought 8 years ago in San Francisco and over the period of two months, I listened it over and over, crying, longing and thinking of the man whom I fell in love. I listened to tracks with smile on my face and a peaceful heart.
I never met him again, never heard from him, I wrote letters, poems, emails for over 4-5 years and not even once, he replied. Before, I never knew what love is, what need is, what attachment means… This desire and longing turned into a spiritual journey, to find a purpose and make a sense of my own existence.
After 8 years, today, is the day that I look into landscapes of my feeling with no fear, resistance, and disapproval. Nothing is hidden, suppressed and disfigured. Every feeling is appreciated and honored.
Could I call this healing, enlightenment or acceptance? This peaceful state within my emotions is changeable, as waves of ocean, some moments rise to a level that might bring discomfort, alongside with a sense of wonder, however it rise, I rise with clarity and more space to observe and allow my emotions.
I certainly have a new understanding of love, sensuality and sexuality. I relate to my being more intimately and not necessary need the presence of a Masculine icon in my life to feel passionate, loving and sexual.
Fifteen years ago, I was a sex addict with no idea of what true love is, how a relationship works? I expected to be loved and cared for, but I wasn’t be able to offer myself that love and care. So, I lash out my body, mind and soul. I brought suffering and unworthiness into my own heart and life and meeting this man was another attempt to fix my addiction. But this time, the encounter led me to waking up and after that every event and change became an invitation to meet and embrace another part of myself, in time, I woke up to this magnificent inner landscape in my heart, constantly creating scenarios and stories to assist this waking up.
Life has become a vast space allowing all happening, love no longer is a need, lust or desire. Love is sacred place to meet every part of myself within mirror of the world. My heart feels vulnerable and transparent most of the time, but I am not running away from feeling, I feel my presence moment by moment and as I every day arrives, I renew my senses by embracing where I am with no reservation.
In totality of each moment, I stay intimate with my feelings and emotions and go beyond surface story, beyond what the mirror shows and how I choose to translate every event and person.
Life no longer needs to be perfect or purposeful. Life is a joy of presence, the greatest learning was and is, to feel sexual, sensual or loving, and I don’t need to be with another. I am enough, today is enough and far more than that, is a mystery that drives my passion and creative force to stay aware and loving and let it merge with magic and anticipation to create something magnificent and simple, from baking a bread to writing a poem. From morning shower to kissing the beloved’s lips.
Life is a constant openness to this mesmerizing landscape, feelings, emotions, colors, verity, mystery, transformation. Life is a rendezvous with Now, to make love.
I am sitting on my favorite armchair, loving all.
Enjoy.

Come back to Earth

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Winter comes and you know its essence,
You sit by fire and drink your coco
remember and let go.

Sleep is full of dreams; the emptiness behind each story,
Silent voice of soul points the less travelled path of heart
With nowhere to hide.

You look up, the colour of sky keeps changing
and your eyes move between shades of clouds
and flying birds,
misty sea front and the sound of running dogs
playing their games.

You mend the walls around your house,
Fences are repaired,
Noisy neighbors are gone.
could you ever feel safe again?

This dark parade and the smell of death
How many more cascades you need
To bury the old and begin “I AM”?
While the bell in your heart rings and rings
“freedom”.

For all you ever know
You can turn your back to east or west
can live as a vagabond,
sell popcorn and exchange dreams
you can’t avoid the Truth anymore.

Mirrors will continue striking your nights
Even when you counting your blessings
The cry of wind pass through your life, loud and disturbing.

You sense the breathing of heaven behind your ear
You see the boundless sea in front
Why are you still frighten to be here, to be “You”?!

Someone whispers stories in “You” of heaviness and struggle,
someone else sings, song of shapeless, timeless
free tomorrows.
So many noises, moment of peace please!

You rest deeper into your heart,
Feeling everything, trusting the sense of not knowing.
Tide rises, tide falls,
vicious wind always have a story to tell,
Sea is the never the same.
Are you safe?
Could you be happy with no need to feel safe?

Trees look at God everyday
seagulls fly over his house
roses bloom under his smile.

Come back to earth,
Stars like magnolias; shall rise from your heart,
Winter is sacred, plant the seeds of your tomorrow
Moment by moment,
With care, patience, reverence and love.

Heaven is the satisfied taste of your hunger
against the earth’s sweet and bountiful breasts of life.
Come back to earth,
rest in roots of your fears and doubts
You shall rise as a tree,
always meeting God.

© Serena Devi January 2015